01-19-10 (Tues) 207.5 lbs

And..We're off!

5:40 am

I don't really know why I'm up so early this morning. Maybe I'm excited that I'm starting the HCG today. Perhaps it's because I knew I was going to get doughnuts this morning for breakfast. I'm not sure. But whatever the reason..I'm up.

I weighed myself this morning and, yes, I lost a pound. Go figure. This being my gorge day, I have to MAKE myself eat like shit today. This goes against everything I've ever been told and everything I've ever done before. Usually, at this point, I am feeling good about myself because I lost 2.5 pounds. This is when I get some motivation. "Down over 2 lbs...cool...maybe I can fit into a size smaller jeans now". Why is it that when we lose A POUND, we get happier, more confident and we think we can buy all new clothes. "I'm no longer 50 pounds overweight, I'm ONLY 48". Now, when someone asks how much weight do you want to loose, we can say, "Oh..around 40". We don't have to say 50.

Sorry, I'm getting off track here.

I'm finding it very hard not to tell anyone. Why is that? Why do I feel I must share my weight loss adventures with others? I DID tell two people at work yesterday. My reasoning for that was to let them know WHY I was going to come into work today and tomorrow with McDonalds, ice cream, chips, etc, when they KNOW I'm trying to loose weight. They think I'm following Weight Watchers. HA. Infidels!!
So, in my opinion, it was easier on me to just tell them. That way I don't have to explain myself when they ask, "What the hell are you doing?" "Is THAT on Weight Watchers?". So...'nuff said there.

My mom called my yesterday. She started Weight Watchers and was asking me a few questions and getting my opinion. Now, seriously... if you were trying to loose weight, why would you ask the FAT person how to do it? Obviously, I'm not the "pillar" of health! I appreciate her confidence in what I have to say but it doesn't seem like the best choice for her success. I did NOT tell her what I was doing. I didn't want to hear the negatives. I've heard them. Hell, I've SAID them.

Lisa wants me to post what I eat every day. I am struggling with that. I will do it but I know that Lisa and Annette are also following a program and I don't want to dangle "virtual" food in the face while I'm gorging today and tomorrow. We'll see. I will most definitely post what I am eating when I get to the Very Low Calorie part on Thursday.

Well, I must sign off and get my day started. I will post more this afternoon.

Ciao for now